Separation

I am working in an oil and gas company and been handling oil and water separation technology for a while. But it is not inspiration behind this post. Though I’ve been vocal about my preference on unfairytale-like endings, there are still instances that I hope that certain relationships will last forever. I’m still human after all.

For months, I have been following the blog of my dear friend, about her struggles against the effects of a failed relationship. We haven’t seen each other for more than two years (well, thanks to webcam though) and all I can give her in times of need are my corniest jokes and not so-serious advices. That’s all I can offer, despite of everything that had happened to her, I want her to spare even a single smile to the rest of the world. She loved and got hurt. Realistically speaking, it can happen to anyone.

However, in her recent posts, I can say that she is indeed on a right track towards recovery and healing. Her writings promise strength, acceptance and determination of moving on. I’m rooting for you! Lessons had been learned on her part I guess. My friend, just embrace the changes that come your way, total recovery on your part will be achieved sooner than you think. You have been an inspiration to me too, now, you know! Haha! I really wish that your next post will be of a new adventure on your refreshed and reborn persona. Good luck and its time to face the world once again. No turning back, okay?

I had my share of separations too since in some points of my life, I fell in love. LOL! I won’t elaborate further on these failed relationships. Each tragic event (LOL!) inspired me to write a poem. Just read between the lines, and I hope you can imagine the story behind them.

In Her Wedding Dress

She exudes an angelic aura,
past enthralled the witnesses
and me.

Her veil reveals
smiles and tears;
walks solemnly towards the altar.

Head towards heaven,
she responds

I do

an affirmation
to a life of poverty,
chastity and obedience

and to a love
that will never be mine.

/totomai

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Japanese Doll

The glass room protects your porcelain skin
against the rays of the rising sun;
bends them to my eyes.
That rainbow halo, a magic of light,
on your face begins my day.

Each morning, before traditional duels
with the teacup, I crawl, over the futon,
toward you to be mesmerized
by the kanzashi on your hair.

The pink hue on your face mirrors
the floral kimono you wear.

How I wish I were the pillow on your back
or the paper fan that your delicate hand holds.

When the moon is out, your silhouette
assures me of a good night's sleep.

In dreamland, I could be a Japanese doll too,
with a heart-shaped forehead
and a katana to safeguard you.

Under the cherry blossoms,
You whisper

sayonara

and wakes me up;

now, pieces of glass and porcelain
cover the wooden floor;
only the kanzashi, paper fan
and kimono remain whole.

/totomai

These separations are somewhat temporary, in my opinion. No matter what closure you made, I mean, there’s a thousand and one ways of seeing each other in the future. You can keep the ending as it is, or you can add another chapter to it. I think permanent separation is more painful. Saying goodbye to a loved one is heartbreaking especially he/she can no longer hear your words and cries. I hope a dear friend and brother of mine will have the strength to face the sad reality of waving her mother goodbye. Permanently. My condolences, kuya. Have a safe trip on your way home to the Philippines. Here’s a song for you.

Separation, like change, is unavoidable.

/totomai
09/05/08